Around 9:30pm, I went to check on John before going to bed. Just as I was about to put my hand on his bedroom door, I stopped dead in my tracks as thoughts began racing through my mind: I just walked across the living room without furniture walking, I'm able to enter his room without waking him and the one that stung my heart I was never able to do this with either of the girls.
There is no denying that I have moments when I feel like I missed out on life. Those are natural thoughts that anyone would have. I just feel like it's up to me (and only me) to focus on the positive. I had a good life and am now living a great life. Sure, I was never able to check in on the girls before I went to bed, but I was able to hold them in my arms and kiss them goodnight, which is something that not every parent is able to do on a nightly basis. For that, I will be forever grateful.